I want my younger brother to look at me in a positive light, I want him to see me as a symbol that working hard does pay off, and that focusing on positive things, and pushing forward, letting go of all the negatives truly do work to benefit your life, I can't talk about it I must be about it. I was about it until some school difficulties arrived, I'm not staying on campus because I don't want to take out loans but the computing back and forth hasn't been easy in the slightest. I don't want to out loans to stay on the campus but then I don't want the trouble of computing and then i think things would be so much easier if I had a job, and thus begins the vicious ugly cycle. I can't stay in that ugly cycle. A path is being created for me as we speak with every difficult challenge I am being molded into the kind of person necessary to handle all the greatness coming her way. Yesterday's vent made me feel better it helped remove all that access,decaying thought and it helps me refill it with awesome, self motivating things. I'm currently facing a challenge but I'm taking to steps to be prepared for the change.
Monday, August 27, 2012
Isn't it crazy what talking it out and a little sleep can do.In the aftermath of a blogger breakdown . It's Monday and I welcome it here for me start off much better than before. I was so excited to write this post because you see, being negative and focusing on negative things like I did in the last post is draining, and after being drained what's left, more negativity to drain and suck me dry but you see I don't have that option. I have a younger brother, with the most beautiful,funny spirit and all the determination, and chances for greatness at his fingertips and I want the best for him. I don't want him to torture his self like I do, I let myself go into this self depreciation and its unhealthy I shouldn't look at my tries as failures I should look at them as building character, building better determination.