Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Peter Pan and I Could of Been Besties
It's a been quite some time since I've done a text heavy post and honestly I've been kind of avoiding it. I will be 19 years old on Aug.16th this year and I'm less than thrilled. I don't want to entirely confront the changes and lack of change I'm facing right now, but I need to accept my present and simply look forward to the future.I have always had a list of things I was supposed to achieve by 18 and I only achieved a few(this is me admittedly being ungrateful). Many people don't accomplish the things I have in 18 years due to circumstances and situations not of their control, such as being accepted to the university of their choice, let alone being accepted to a university at all(another thing I've taken for granted). Although my achievements are good and I should be happy I've gotten this far, these's this nagging critic raining on what should be my party. Celebrating what I have achieved in my 19 years is a struggle because this attachment to what I initially wanted to be by now is so strong.
I've come to acknowledge the best way to eliminate this issue, is to get rid of the time factor, not the bucket list. Goals are stand alone events, they have a spotlight of their own. How old you are by the time you achieve your goal, doesn't necessarily affect it, as long as you have achieved it,should be the main focus. Time is all in the mind, it's a man-made thing. God doesn't run on the schedule we do, therefore certain things will not be done in the manner we want them but as long as we put in the effort they will be done, that's what matters.
Eliminating my time constraints is a freeing feeling. Just because my goal isn't done on the time I wanted it to be that doesn't mean I still can't do it, that doesn't mean the dream is dead. Dreams only grow old and die when you let them, not because of the hands on a clock. I refuse to let my dreams simply fade because they didn't happen at a specific time.My dreams belong to me therefore they will never run late, because they run with me.This year I'm truly understanding what it means to embody the spirit of a dreamer, it's accepting both an eternity of uncertainty and scrutiny but it's also gaining the talent for creation,originality and enjoying your independent view on things. Dreamers are not just these people couch surfing every other night, and slacking. They are people who believe in their own specific vision and live in their own world where time doesn't matter and accepting defeat is unheard of. I am on the cusp of being 19 and have recently learned how to dream.
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